![]() ![]() I feared what people would say and I feared what people would think of me. I wrote an official letter that outlines my feelings and reasoning for forging the Miss New Castle County 2016 title: Official LetterĪfter fighting an inner battle for months of whether or not to go forth with this year, I fought another inner battle- speaking out or going quietly. It ultimately sealed the deal that I needed to follow both my head and my heart, and pursue other ventures that will truly benefit me as a person. I took being chosen for the opportunity as a huge sign. In addition, I have been given a career furthering opportunity that will rightfully take precedence in my life. And to me, it’s not about sacrificing your self-worth, self-respect, and virtually every quality that makes you “you” to win a crown. It was not until recently when I was able to take a step back and remember what was important. I put all my effort into forcing myself to go through with this year and finish out my reign. I have prided myself on never being labeled a “quitter”. For me, in my life, none of that could ever be worth a crown. Ultimately, I had to have the realization that it is not worth it. I have ignored the urge to respectfully and rightfully stand up for myself to try and avoid issues. I feel that I have battled defaming and character attacking rumors, many comments that have been detrimental to my self-confidence, isolation, disrespect- the list could go on. I have kept so much to myself in hopes that I will be able to fly under the radar and ultimately have a positive experience. ![]() I could write a novel and fill its pages, detailing the good, the bad, and the ugly of what I feel I have experienced, but I will try my best to keep this relatively short and to the point. Therefore, I have decided to forgo any and all scholarship awards I have received this year and also forgo competing in the Miss Delaware Scholarship Pageant in June of 2016. I have decided to forgo the title of Miss New Castle County 2016 with the Miss Delaware Scholarship Organization effective immediately. I am now 21 years old, and have finally been able to have the realization that so much has changed. I was 19 years old when my journey began and I was optimistic, motivated, and thrilled to have the opportunity to fulfill a childhood dream. ![]() It’s been almost a year and a half since I began my journey with the Miss Delaware Scholarship Organization. ![]()
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